Thursday, December 18, 2008

Goodbye, Paycheck...

...it was nice knowing you. No, I'm not getting fired (and no, it's not because I called in gay.) My problem going forward isn't going to be with receiving a paycheck--it's going to be with keeping it. You see, yesterday, I went to a meeting of my fellow network admins from the various departments at work, and one my colleagues had a cool site to show everyone--a techie site called DealExtreme, and more specifically, their "gadgets under $2 section". It's like iTunes--I start out just after one or two things, but the more I look, the more I want, greedy bastard that I am. Who wouldn't want a double-LED keychain flashlight shaped like a pig? Or a butane lighter shaped like a cigarette? The cigar snobs would FREAK if they saw me light a cigar with that! A 2-in-1 laser pointer and LED flashlight? Two ways to blind people! An iPod cable for $2 and change? I paid over $20 the last time I needed one! And the best part--all of these little toys ship for free. No "$10 shipping on a $5 purchase" nonsense here. So thanks a lot for showing me this site, Steve...maybe I'll come move in with you when my mortgage payment is spent on yet another shipment of cheapo gadgets.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

3 Sixes

I've been tagged--challenged by Squidly to post the 6th photo from the 6th page of my Flickr stream. So here it is--an action shot of a Rangers game I was at nearly a year ago.

Action around the net

According to the way the game works, I'm supposed to tag six more bloggers to do the same, but like Squidly, I don't know that many, and the ones I do know don't use Flickr. Nonetheless, if you guys ever get it, I tag the Brooklyn Blowhard and the Outhouse Times-Picayune to post some pictures.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

No, Wait, I'm Here

I have to make a post today--I wouldn't want anyone to think I called in sick. I'd've been at work today if I'd contracted a case of the Ebola virus. I wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong idea. Heck, even the indicted soon-to-be-ex-governor of Illinois made sure to bail himself out of jail and get his ass into the office.

Not that I have anything against the gays. As far as I'm concerned, whatever anyone wants to do behind closed doors is their own business. As long as you don't hit my nose, you just go ahead and swing your arms in big, giant windmills. But Prop 8 is a different story entirely. That was a referendum--perhaps the purest form of democracy there is in this country; the ultimate in majority rule. And in this case, the majority decided they didn't want gay marriage, by a 6% margin--in a state the size of California, that's a lot of people! This protest is all about using the courts and/or legislature to overrule the direct, stated will of the majority of the people. And no matter what the issue, that's just un-American.

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Party Like It's 1999 (or 1993)

I had a longer drive than usual to my family's Thanksgiving dinner this past weekend, due to the fact that my parents are now happy retirees living in Tioga County, PA rather than Berks County, PA. Fortunately, I had good company for the ride--new albums by bands I used to listen to growing up: Guns 'N Roses, AC/DC, and Metallica. The latter two were and still are two of my favorite bands ever (Metallica's godawful "St. Anger" notwithstanding), and although I wouldn't count G'n'R in the "favorite" category, I usually don't turn the radio off when their songs come on. The results--well, they were pretty much as I thought they'd be before giving them a listen.

Best Overall Album: Metallica - Death Magnetic
Wow, these guys are back in a big, big way. Following the aforementioned piece of crap St. Anger with this is reminiscent of the New York Football Giants winning the Super Bowl last year after losing their first two games in embarassing fashion. This album has a retro thrash-metal feel, getting back to the long, epic songs Metallica was famous for in the '80s. There's even an instrumental composition--they haven't had one of those since "...And Justice For All" (not counting "Ecstasy of Gold" on "S&M"). Even the song I expected to suck (The Unforgiven III--songs don't need sequels, and they definitely don't need second sequels) didn't.

Best Songs: AC/DC - Black Ice
This one was exactly what I expected: fifteen new AC/DC songs with the same great sound this band has always had. You could take any one of these tracks, tack it onto the end of a copy of Back in Black, hand it to a non-AC/DC fan, and they wouldn't know it didn't belong. Great car songs that will be staying on my iPod for a long time to come.

Most Improved: Guns 'N Roses - Chinese Democracy
This group really shouldn't be called Guns 'N Roses anymore--more like "Axl and Friends", since he's the only member left. That aside, there were a lot of songs here that I really dug. Certainly not good enough to justify 15 years of production, but not bad. A very "modern" sound compared to a lot of early G'n'R stuff that hasn't aged particularly well. (Can anyone make it through a complete listening of "Patience" without changing the dial or hitting fast-forward? Didn't think so.)

These are all worth a listen, but ranking them is more a matter of personal preference than anything else. For me, I'll stick with the new Metallica, but would recommend any of these people like me who were fans of these bands in the '80s and '90s.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly: November Edition

Since I've been neglecting the blog updates lately, I figured now was as good a time as any to unveil a new feature that'd catch everybody up on what I've been doing and thinking lately. Of course there's two sections of bitching for every one of positivity, because that's just how I roll.

The Good: Fallout 3 I've been playing obsessively in between drinking binges, work, and drinking binges at work. I'm not going to give it a full-length review (there's a good one over at Squidly.com), but suffice to say that this is the best game I've played in several years. Great story, great voice acting, great graphics (even on a midrange system), and most importantly good gameplay that makes it feel like part of the Fallout family, despite being made by a new development house. Bonus points for moving the setting away from the West Coast (where I haven't been in about 15 years) to the Washington, D.C. area (where I was this past weekend). It's a cliche at this point, but if you only play one game this year.....yeah.

The Bad: Ben Folds - Way To Normal It breaks my heart to have to do this, but one of my all-time favorites has had this coming for a while now. His last album (Songs for Silverman) fell into that category of "OK-but-not-my-favorite", but this one sinks to a whole different level of suck. I committed to listening to the whole thing, but found myself wanting to just turn it off halfway through. Most of the songs are lyrically unrelatable (at least to me) and Folds's normally melodic piano rock is overlaid with obnoxious synthesized sounds through most of the album. I just hope this album is a one-time aberration and not a shift in direction.

The Ugly: The 2008 Election I sure hope I'm wrong about our president-elect. I hope so, but I don't think so. He's vowed to "share the wealth" and his standard of what defines "wealth" gets lower and lower with every press conference. You can't legislate charity, folks. America is the land of opportunity, but it seems like the Obammunists are confusing the definition of "opportunity" with that of "guarantee". And his promises to stop President Bush's new drilling and "bankrupt" the coal industry? Yeah, that's really going to help the economy turn around. I'm praying that I'm wrong and that the next four years go smoothly and successfully...but I think I'm right.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

First, Kill All The Lawyers

I was eating my lunch and reading this little gem when I ran across the closing line:

The distraught family said they want to know why the unidentified neighbor was more interested in taking the pictures than trying to get them off the roof.
I want to know why the neighbors would want to try to get them off the roof. Imagine if one of those children had gone kersplat while you were up there trying to get them in. Now imagine the mother's ambulance-chaser(s) coming after you trying to get everything you own after said kersplat. Now thank John Edwards and other anti-tort reformers for giving us a society where doing the right thing just ain't worth it. And keep that in your memory a week from Tuesday when you vote for a new president and Congress.

Monday, September 29, 2008

Baseball Travelin' 2008

Three parks in two weekends. The last day game ever at Yankee Stadium. The first big league homer for a top catching prospect. And the Phillies clinching yet another division title following yet another epic Mets collapse.

And I still haven't gotten the photos up on Flickr because I'm out of upload for the month. At this rate, I'm going to have to go pro sooner rather than later.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Secret Agent Man

Join the Secret Service for a life of adventure, valiantly protecting the life of the President and various other world leaders.

Oh, wait.

Rewrite: Join the Secret Service to dig nickels out of a swamp. Hazardous duty pay for each one you have to clean blood and brain matter off of.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

I Got Your F***ing NewsBuster Right Here

I'm a big fan of NewsBusters.org, the blog that exposes liberal bias in the mainstream media (disclosure: one of my closest friends is a former writer for the site; unfortunately, I couldn't find a link to his past columns in a 15 second search). In that spirit, I present this article from Slate (a subsite of MSN): "What's the Matter With Canada? [subtitle:] How the world's nicest country turned mean." They flat-out equate conservatism with "meanness". It's one step shy of putting a thumb on the tip of their nose, wiggling their fingers, and making a fart noise with their tongue out.

Read it (by "it", I mean the language) and weep, folks:

"After decades of encouraging countries to increase their foreign-aid spending, Canada cut its own, from 0.34 percent of GDP in 2005 to just 0.2 percent last year."

Because in a period of economic downturn, it's irresponsible to conserve your national wealth to help your own citizens. Assholes.

"Long a beacon of human rights, Ottawa announced last fall that it would stop advocating on behalf of Canadians sentenced to death in other countries."

Because convicted murderers and rapists, in the age of DNA, when there's seldom any doubt of guilt at all, let alone reasonable doubt, deserve such consideration. Douchebags.

"The Conservatives may not represent the views of most Canadians, but with four parties fighting for the left-wing vote, the Conservatives might win simply by sliding up the middle."

Because the middle consists of ignorant hayseeds whose opinions shouldn't count because they're wrong, wrong, wrong, even if they're in the majority, because they're wrong, right? Dipshits.

I've been done with MSNBC ever since they caved to the vocal minority and cancelled Imus, but I'm now seriously considering being done with MSN altogether, if this is the kind of "news" that they put forth. I didn't stumble across this on a deep search--the article was linked right off their front page tonight. These are the kind of shenanigans that make me think long and hard about changing my start page to ESPN. On all of my computers. And in an election year, that's just sad.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Oh Hell No

I've played Half-Life. I've seen how this story ends.

I've been having trouble sleeping lately as it is. This is going to make me an absolute insomniac.

We've pretty much gotten rid of Castro, and now apparently Kim Jong-Il, and for what? Just in time for the world to collapse in a resonance cascade series of black holes because some egghead forgot to carry a one somewhere.

Thursday, September 04, 2008

Liveblog: NFL 2008 Season Opener

Thought I'd try a liveblog here tonight as I get ready to watch the Giants-Redskins opener here. For the uninitiated, that means I'll be posting a series of random and increasingly incoherent thoughts in this post as the game progresses. You can keep hitting refresh for my expert commentary. Newest update goes under this drivel, but above the previous updates.


0:00 1-0 record, 1-0 division record. Not a bad start to the year. I hope Kiwanuka is OK--he got hurt on the last play and NBC cut over to the convention before they could find out how he is. Guess I'll flip over to ESPN News for Coughlin's press conference. Good night, everyone!

2:00 warning Jim Zorn is completely lost here. I've seen Pop Warner coaches manage the clock better. We got this, boys. We got this.

5:51 Same score since the second quarter, and Tuck just made a FANTASTIC stop following the late hit penalty. My confidence is returning.

10:53 The "meatatarian" Wendy's commercial almost makes me want to become a vegetarian. Almost.

12:55 We're up by 2 scores in the 4th quarter. If you'd offered me that deal at kickoff, I'd have taken it. Offense could have been better, but what the hell.

4th qtr, 14:18 The offensive line is doing their job. If the defense keeps doing theirs, we might just be able to run out the clock on this sucker.

2:14 Long injury time out. Fortunately, it's Fred Smoot and not one of the Giants.

6:30 A promising drive ends with Eli getting picked on a bad overthrow of Boss. And all three of my fantasy teams drop two points. Freaking awesome.

8:33 Three plays later and the Skins are punting, proving my histrionics premature as usual. Pretty literate sentence from me, but I'm only on my third beer since kickoff.

9:32 It's all falling apart as Portis busts off a 20+ yard run. If the Giants lose, this is where it all went to hell.

10:14 Giants' first punt. Not too shabby, but like I said down there, we need touchdowns!

12:50 Wow, he caught that with his yambag. Good thing Tom didn't try to challenge that (not that he would have with 4th down coming up.)

3rd qtr, 15:00 Giants website finally has a chat room back on their website, after a long hiatus. It's not the haven for knowledgeable football fans that it used to be. I'm disappointed.

Halftime and I'm nervous as can be. Taking a break from the liveblog.

0:13 16-7. One bad series pretty much negates a half that couldn't have gone better up till the two minute warning.

1:04 This isn't funny any more. If the Skins get a touchdown here, it'll be eerily close, despite the Giants' first half dominance on both sides of the ball.

1:10 Mark this down: Jason Campbell finally completes his first pass. If you have him on your fantasy team, YOU LOSE!

1:52 The Redskins finally caught a break on poor kickoff coverage by the Giants' special teams. That looked like Fassel's kick coverage teams, not Coughlin's.

2:25 No way was a run play the right call there. Now we have to settle for another FG, and a long one for Carney at that. He got it, though--16-0 G-Men.

4:52 Madden: "Laron Landry is not going to tackle [Brandon Jacobs] high again". Translation: Laron Landry is scared shitless of Brandon Jacobs.

11:03 Giants need to get some touchdowns on these long drives. If they're settling for 3 against the Redskins, what are they going to do against a real opponent?

2nd qtr, 12:43 These Coors Light "press conference remix" commercials are just about played out.

End Q1: The scoreboard doesn't do justice to how one-sided this game has been thus far. The Giants are pretty much moving at will, and the Redskins offense has more yards on penalties than on actual plays.

1:51 Hmmm. I wonder if the Eagles are still paying Jerome McDougle under the table. Nice penalty, jerkoff.

2:49 Redskins false start on the first play of their second drive. FACED on the next play. The 'Skins might be worse than even I thought this year.

2:53 I wonder how much the Giants have to pay for the custom small facebar on John Carney's helmet. I thought sure Morten Andersen was the last guy grandfathered in to use those. Oh yeah--10 to zip Giants. Boo-yah.

4:03 Wow--seven years of Madden and Michaels? Call me old fashioned, but I still miss Pat Summerall.

4:34 Jacobs is a BEAST. That hit he just laid on Laron Landry could make it to "Jacked Up" on Monday.

9:15 First play from scrimmage is a SACK! Justin Tuck isn't going to get through the whole season with that little attention, though.

9:54 TOUCHDOWN G-MEN! Nice drive, but you shudder to see your QB take on a defender and dive for the end zone on first down in the first series of the season. Ask Pennington how bad a shoulder injury can screw your career up.

10:01 And your referee for the evening is Muscles (or is that Mussels) Marinara, aka Ed Hochulie. Nice.

10:43 Heck of a throw and Plaxico is EN FUEGO!!!!~!

10:55 Watch the slapping, Jacobs. We don't need to be knocked out of FG range on a dumbass penalty.

12:20 WOW was the coverage on Burress blown there. The Redskins don't just suck, they su-hu-hu-hu-huck.

1st qtr, 14:00 Nice to see Steve Smith getting looks early. He was an important part of the Super Bowl offense.

Kickoff: Bad blocking by the G-Men on the return. I almost wish they'd kicked off so we could get a good look at the Osi-less D line.

Pregame 3: Strahan calls Giants fans the "greatest fans in sports." Not buying it, at least for the fans at the stadium. In my experience, the fans at the stadium are mostly douchebags who sit on their hands when they should be making noise.

Pregame 2: Also just realized that the game is on NBC, not NFL Network. I'm a mess tonight.

Pregame: When I tuned in NFL Network, I found Usher warbling off-key, so I threw on a Simpsons rerun instead. Would have loved to have caught some pregame but I didn't realize until shortly after 6 PM that the game was at 7:00, not 8:00 due to the Republican convention. Hoping my stromboli gets here before the game starts. Also, really, really hoping for a Giants win. Eli is the QB of all three of my fantasy teams, and I have the Giants picked for a LOT of points in my NFL pick-em pool.

Friday, August 08, 2008

Gitmo Ain't No Nuremberg

Bin Laden's driver gets a slap on the wrist
Apparently, in the 21st century, "I vas only follovink orders" is a viable defense. That's the only way to explain the wimpy sentence of 5 1/2 years handed down to confessed Al-Qaida member Salim Hamdan, Osama Bin Laden's personal chauffeur, yesterday. Check out this quote from the MSNBC article linked at the top of this post:

Referring to the decks of cards the U.S. military has distributed with images of most-wanted terrorists, Davis said: "Hamdan would be the two of clubs."
But even the two of clubs is in the deck--and there's only 52 cards! That means one of the top 52 terrorists on our list is eligible to be released in as little as five months. Five. Months. For someone who was there and working with the plotters of one of the worst mass murders ever committed. The verdict and sentence of the first Guantanamo trial was a chance to send a message to the world that terrorism will be punished harshly, if not swiftly. Instead, the message we've sent is that we're going soft, right as we head for a period of transition at the highest levels of our government. I just hope this message isn't paid for, in the end, with American lives.

Thursday, August 07, 2008

Favre and Away

Wouldn't it be nice to remember Brett Favre like this?

Or like this?

Or maybe holding the Lombardi Trophy after Super Bowl XXXI?

Instead, all but the most die-hard Packer and Favre fans have this enduring image:

Yep, ol' number 4, in front of a crowd of reporters, ambiguating like a John Kerry campaign speech. I don't begrudge the guy wanting to come back for one more year, but look at the position he put his team in. He announced his retirement; the Packers have to plan for the coming season and beyond. Handing over the starting QB reins for one more year may sound good sentimentally, but it would have been a piss-poor business decision. Trading him to a division rival or releasing him (and freeing him to sign with the same rivals) when he clearly had value in a trade would have been just as bad. Green Bay did the only sensible thing they could have done when they shipped him to the Jets late last night: allow their "QB of the Future" to begin his new life as a starter, get Favre out of not just the division, but the conference, and get some value to improve their team for '09 and beyond. Now that the deal is done, hopefully the national sports media can quit indulging Brett Favre's seemingly unquenchable desire for the spotlight and get their focus back on training camps, preseason games (did anyone even know that the Hall of Fame game was last Sunday?), and the upcoming season. And Brett Favre better hope that he still has enough left in the tank to live up to all the hype that's been surrounding him. It's unlikely a bad season will keep him out of Canton, but at the very least, it'll get the voters thinking, "At least Montana knew when to hang it up."

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Random Thoughts 7.29.08

  • I was watching the Eddie Murphy movie The Distinguished Gentleman over the weekend, and was amazed how similar his campaign speeches in the beginning sounded to some of the things Barack Obama is saying now. In 1992, these were supposed to be the inane ramblings of a con artist, and it was supposed to be funny to think that people would buy into it and vote for him.
  • Bennigan's is filing for bankruptcy. They haven't been the same since they discontinued the burger topped with the giant wheel of fried mozzarella, but I'm sure going to miss the deep-fried turkey-and-ham-and-cheese sandwiches.
  • With NFL training camp opening, and Jeremy Shockey living the Mardi Gras life this season, I need to take what may be one of the last opportunities to gloat over my Giants' Super Bowl win by posting this pic:

    That's right, it's a Nicaraguan peasant wearing one of the unsellable Patriots 2007 world champs T-shirts.
  • Richie Sexson sucks.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

No I Don't Have Feelings

'Cuz feelings are gay!

Weekend misogyny, beeyotches!

Friday, July 25, 2008

That About Sums It Up

This is an actual bumper sticker. You can get it here, and the proceeds go to a good cause. First seen on Vodkapundit.

This is about where I'm at as far as the '08 election goes (though you have no idea how happy I am to see that bloodsucker Edwards caught up in a scandal that's going to cost him a shot at VP). What the hell, I live in Delaware--my state's whopping three electoral votes are going to Obama no matter what I do. Maybe I'll throw my vote away on Bob Barr. I'm really more of a Libertarian in Republican's clothing anyway.

Friday, July 11, 2008

Stray-Rod

The last-ever MLB All-Star Game at Yankee Stadium is right around the corner, and all the buzz this week is about....A-Rod and Madonna. Of course, all this comes as a surprise to no one who's been paying any kind of attention to baseball and/or the gossip pages (which seem to be pretty interchangeable right now)--strippers are crawling out of the woodwork to get their 15 seconds (you don't get minutes in this case; he's a ballplayer, not a governor) of fame by telling the world they banged A-Rod (seen at left popping out with the game on the line in the 9th--AGAIN), and he was even caught going to a Toronto hotel last year with a stripper who bore a body type resemblance to She-Hulk. No, the only question here is what on earth would possess the soon-to-be-ex-Mrs. Rodriguez to conceive a second child with a world-class philanderer like her soon-to-be-ex-husband. It all becomes clearer if you accept the rumors that she ditched them in Miami while she ran around Paris with Lenny Kravitz: more kid$=more child $upport. There's gold in them thar balls!

Of course, I do have to stick up for the guy a little bit--he plays for my team, after all. My pal and Red Sox fan Pat sent me this little gem, making sure to point out the part about A-Rod drinking sex-on-the-beach cocktails. Yeah, drinking fruit drinks and then nailing a hot stripper--that's really gay, there, buddy! If only he could be more hetero--you know, like Papi and Man-Ram.

Friday, June 27, 2008

Use(less)net

By now everyone who reads this blog knows what a huge fan I am of the New York Football Giants. What you may not know is where I go for my daily dose of breaking Giants news. Of course I check BBI on a daily basis, but that site is only updated daily, so for breaking news and discussion, I head for the Giants newsgroup on Usenet (for the truly geeky, it's alt.sports.football.pro.ny-giants). There, I can find out what other Giants fans are reading, watching, and thinking, and occasionally I even participate in the discussion.

But all that just got a lot harder. In an egregious example of overstepping the authority of one's office, New York State Attorney General Andrew Cuomo has strongarmed several major internet service providers into dropping most or all access to Usenet newsgroups. The reason? 88 out of over 100,000 of them--that's around .08%--contained some form of child porn. Does this sound like overkill to you? Why not ban digital cameras? Or analog cameras and scanners? That would ensure that no one ever trades child porn again ever. Or extend it into other areas of life. Want to reduce highway fatalities? Ban automobiles--everyone takes the train! But wait, once in a while, people get hit by trains (either accidentally or as a means of suicide). So it looks like we're back to the ol' Foot 'n' Leather Express.

The Founding Fathers thought that the right to free and open speech and expression was so important that they made it the very first piece of the Bill of Rights. But Cuomo doesn't seem to care, extorting ISPs with the threat of bad publicity, since, as the CNet article stresses, using the law to accomplish this has already been ruled unconstitutional. Hopefully, the ACLU (who, in their defense, was involved in overturning Pennsylvania's attempt to legislate Internet censorship) will take a break from defending terrorists and rapists and put the pressure on New York and the ISPs to bring back our newsgroups. My Giants offseason depends on it.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Tech Tip: Clean Your System

One of our staff introduced me to a great little utility last week to clean up (and speed up) Windows-based systems. It's called CrapCleaner, or CCleaner for short. There's not much to it--just download it (it's freeware), install it, and run it until it says there's nothing left to clean. It doesn't take too long to run, and most of the default settings work just fine. My only caveat is to think twice before letting it clean up your Internet Explorer/Firefox stuff. Chances are if you've got saved passwords/browser histories/recently typed URLs, you've got them for a reason, and deleting them won't give you much of a speed boost. Other than that, this is a great little utility for computers that haven't been formatted in a while.

Monday, June 16, 2008

In Memoriam: Tim Russert 1950-2008

I was asked over the weekend if I would be taking down the farting video that I posted a couple of weeks ago in light of Tim Russert's passing on Friday. The answer is no, I won't, but I will take a moment to pay respect to a good newsman. Russert did a better job than most at attempting to put his personal views aside and present a balanced viewpoint, always asking the tough questions regardless of the subject's political affiliations. Russert's voice will be missed among the mainstream media elite.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Strahan

With the start of the NFL's training camp season right around the corner, one of my all-time favorite Giants, Michael Strahan, announced his retirement yesterday. I'm a little surprised that he'd walk away from a guaranteed $4 million (with bonuses rumored to kick in at the almost-surely-reachable level of 6 sacks), especially to rebuild his war chest after his shrew of an ex-wife cleaned him out, but I can respect his desire to go out with his health more or less intact and as a Super Bowl champion. He has the single season sack record, and he's still nearly 60 sacks behind the career record, so that one is likely forever out of his reach. It would have been nice of him to have let his team, his coach, or at least his front office staff know of his decision before announcing it to the press, but for the most part, his departure was fittingly dignified. Let's just hope he's learned a thing or two from Tiki Barber and leaves behind any petty grudges he may have had in the locker room as he searches for a job in the broadcast booth. Thanks for fifteen great years, captain.

Friday, May 23, 2008

Friday Videos 5.23.08

In honor of Yankee skipper Joey G. getting the boot during last night's win over the O's, here's the best manager tirade ever:



And here's Meet the Press host Tim Russert on MSNBC. He loses his train of thought right after he says "No one has appeared on that program..." at about 14 seconds in. See if you can hear why:

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Teddy and McCain

Ted Kennedy has a malignant brain tumor. John McCain is releasing his medical records. With timing like that, it can't be coincidence. I won't be at all surprised to see whichever candidate the Democrats end up nominating try to make some political hay out of this--after all, McCain is only a few years younger than Uncle Teddy, and is himself a cancer survivor (albeit "only" melanoma--a skin cancer). The Dems, especially Obama, love to portray themselves as young and hip and paint conservatives as old fuddy-duddies. It worked pretty well against Bob Dull Dole, but wasn't quite so hot against Reagan in the '80s. Hopefully McCain's medical history won't have any red flags, because while I'm not his biggest supporter, I respect his service record and find him far less abhorrent than Obama/Clinton and will be voting for him in November.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Fists of Fury

Goose Gossage is crying "fowl" over Joba Chamberlain's fist-pumps after inning-ending strikeouts. He does bear a striking resemblance to Howard Dean in 2004, but Joba's just an emotional guy who really loves the game and reacts just as visibly to a bad outing as a good one. Papelbon up there in Boston has been known to do almost the same thing after he closes out a game, but he almost always gets a free pass. (He did catch a little bit of heat for dancing around in his underwear, but hey, the Sox had just won the Series, so even I'll give him a pass for that one.) And how many home runs has Man-Ram stood there and watched? Joba's not trying to show guys up--he's just showing a little heart and emotion. That is acting like a Yankee, no matter what Goose says. And it's nothing but good for the game.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Man Movies I Missed

I was watching TV earlier and saw the commercial for the new Indiana Jones flick. I know there's a lot of buzz about it, but I'm just not catching the fever and couldn't understand why, until it hit me that I've never actually seen any of the first three all the way through. Sure, I've flipped past the boulder scene, or Mola Ram tearing out the dude's heart, but I've never sat down with a glass of scotch or a Chicory Stout and watched Raiders of the Lost Ark, or Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. That got me to thinking....there are a lot of classic "guy staples" that I've never taken the time to watch. Maybe it's something I should work on the next time I get a rainy Saturday. Here's a list of what I consider the top 10 that I've never seen (at least not all the way through):

10. War Games
9. Platoon
8. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels
7. Heat
6. Scarface
5. Any of the existing Indiana Jones trilogy
4. The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
3. Rocky I or II (though I've seen III and IV so many times I can probably recite them from memory
2. Casino
1. Raging Bull

And that's just a small sampling. I ought to be ashamed of myself.

Friday, May 09, 2008

New Blogroll: Bill and Iris

As seen on NewsBusters: this is the blog of my buddy Nuts McCracken over at the August Knights Forums. Lots of good politics content over there.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Fun With My Front Page

I just found something fun to do--go down a few entries and start playing the Lee Elia video, then go to the Hartford Whalers theme vid in the previous post and start playing it. If you do it right, the horns should kick in just as Lee starts ranting, and it makes a pretty good remix. Kind of like a very, very, very poor man's Dark Side of the Moon/Wizard of Oz.

Speaking of poor men, check out FreeRice--a vocabulary tester that donates food to poor children with flies in their eyes for every word you get right. (For instance, did you know that "petcock" means "valve"?) If you really want to help, have a dictionary site open in another tab and look each word up--there are no time penalties. After all, "if you ain't cheatin', you ain't tryin'." Hat tip to my gal for the link. And for just putting up with me.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Sportsmanship or Stupidity?

Watch this ESPN video (hat tip to Nuts McCracken over at the August Knights message boards for the clip):



Now, beyond the obvious Eight Belles jokes, this goes past the r ealm of good sportsmanship and into outright stupidity. Good sportsmanship means rendering aid to a fallen opponent. It means calling out the trainer and not kicking the downed player in the back of her injured leg. It doesn't mean you give them free runs and knock yourself out of the tournament (even if, had the rule been interpreted correctly, the pinch runner would have been allowed to complete the home run anyhow). Injuries happen in sports--they suck, but they happen. Good sportsmanship means not taking unfair advantage--not giving up fair advantage.

Sunday, May 04, 2008

Superbad

OK, this is a new feature that I came up with late at night, but if it takes 3 Twitter posts to say something, it goes in a blog post instead. So I just finished watching Superbad, and why does it seem like half the population feels the need to say "Dude! I'm McLovin'!" when McLovin is the douchiest, most cringe-inducing character in a movie that (while freakin' funny) is full of douchy, cringe-inducing characters? I also kind of wish they'd resolved the plotline of who robbed the liquor store, but that's neither here nor there.

Thursday, May 01, 2008

25th Anniversary: Lee Elia

OK, I'm actually a couple of days late on this, but 25 years-and-two-days ago today,
the Cubs were off to one of the worst starts in baseball history. Night baseball was still years away, and the few fans that were attending were more interested in heckling the team than rooting for them. All that led to this live, over-the-air press conference by then-manager (and future ex-Phillies manager) Lee Elia (contains lots of naughty language, so it's not for the lily-livered or for watching at work):



Hat tip to UmpBump for the reminder and link to the vid.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Brass Bonanza

My buddy Pat got this song stuck in my head while we sat around looking for hilarious YouTube clips, drinking coffee, watching pre-NFL Draft coverage, and scratching ourselves, and now I'm going to punish all of you lucky Beastards with it, because that's just the kind of guy I am. Enjoy!

Duh

Gasoline thefts rise with pump prices - MSN Money

Surprise, surprise. When even smaller cars start costing $30 or more per tank, the less honest element is going to start looking for ways around it. If you let them just hit the cash button and start filling up without prepaying, you deserve what you get. "But I want to preserve the trust relationship with my customers!" Great--how about you let them trust you for a while until prices come down? They can trust you because you're not going anywhere, and if you don't hold up your end of the transaction, they can come back inside and kick your ass. Who pays cash for gas, anyway, in this day and age? Yeah, I want to stand in line behind someone who's manually picking out their $100 of Powerball numbers when I can just swipe my card through the scanner on the pump. This was probably the most useless fluff article posing as "financial news" I've ever read.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

The Beast's Cookbook: Garden Pasta with White Wine Sauce

I'll upload a picture later.

This is a simple, relatively healthy meal, but you can cut back a bit on the butter if you're concerned about that sort of thing. It goes great with whole wheat pasta of any sort, not just spaghetti. The idea for the sauce started from a spinach recipe from my brother (a professional chef).

1 lb. spaghetti
9 to 12 oz. spinach, stems removed
4 medium tomatoes, chopped
4 tbsp. butter
1/4 cup white wine
1 tbsp. garlic
1 tsp. oregano
1 tsp. basil
Parsley, for garnish

In a large skillet, melt the butter and add the spinach until just wilted. Add the tomatoes, oregano, and basil; leave on the heat, stirring, for about 3-4 minutes. Add the wine and simmer for about 5 minutes. Meanwhile, prepare the spaghetti according to package directions. Toss the spaghetti with the veggies and sauce. Garnish with parsley and top with parmesan cheese.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Potty Mouth

The Blog-O-Cuss Meter - Do you cuss a lot in your blog or website?Hat tip to milblog Op-For for this one. I'm actually surprised it's not higher given my twisted sense of humor and occasional lapses into coprolalia.

On a related subject, I was driving this afternoon and heard--on FM radio--Sublime's song "Caress Me Down". I was a little surprised that the more....descriptive....sexual content in English was left unmolested--fines have been levied for less. Even more amazing is that the outright Spanish cursing was deemed O.K. by the powers-that-be at this Philly rock station (that I'll leave anonymous). Apparently, only English "swear words" count. Now, who's going to have the stones to play Carlin's "Seven Dirty Words" routine translated into Swahili? I'd even go back to listening to WYSP if they did that.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Chelsea and Monica

It's become the Question that Won't Go Away for Chelsea Clinton as she tours Indiana shilling for her mom: what about the Lewinsky thing? Her answer is always some variant of "none of your business," and the short answer is that it really isn't. Except...

There's no doubt that when the scandal first broke in early 1997 that Chelsea was the most innocent victim of the scandal--a teenage girl forced into the public eye strictly because of who her dad was. That's not the case any more. She's an adult now, and a willing participant in her mother's run for the White House. And when we're trying to choose a president, the private lives of the candidates are relevant. Character counts! The way Hilary handled a crisis in her own home is a reflection of how she can reasonably be expected to handle issues requiring character as the president, and as long as Chelsea is out there speaking on Hil-dawg's behalf, it's reasonable to ask about such a highly publicized situation when speaking to someone who was close to it. She has as much right to refuse to answer as anyone else has right to ask, but avoiding the issue doesn't do her mom any favors.

Monday, April 07, 2008

Viagra Has Finally Crossed A Line

I was sitting in a bar in the Broad Ripple district of Indianapolis watching the Fox baseball "game of the week" on Saturday when the Nashville country music version of the "Viva Viagra" commercial came on. (I wanted to embed the video here, but I couldn't find it on YouTube or Break.com. So if you haven't seen it yet, go to this page on Viagra's site and click the link for the video labeled "Nashville. Go ahead, I'll wait. And if you find a version on a video site that I can embed, tell me about it and I'll give you full credit.)

Of course this is a commercial that I've seen a hundred different times, given the sheer number of sporting events that I've tuned into, but for some reason, this viewing was disturbing. At first I thought it was because the bar TV's closed captioning was displaying the lyrics to the commercial while The Escape Club was playing on the jukebox over the speaker system. Then I realized that just as I was watching this commercial alone and uncomfortable, my lovely girlfriend having stepped away momentarily, this commercial is nothing but a bunch of men in cowboy hats singing about their love for tumescence. Let me repeat that: Viagra's new commercial is a bunch of guys in a darkened room singing about getting a rod. Not a woman can be found. If you thought watching sports with your family and friends couldn't get more awkward than Cialis's mentions of four-hour erections....think again.

Update: I just noticed that the "Nashville" commercial is similar to the "Roadhouse" commercial. At least in the latter, the singers all go their separate ways, presumably off to their women, once they've finished singing about their boner pills.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

My Bedroom Worth

bedroom toys

I'm no Ashley Dupré, but that's not too shabby. Maybe I'm in the wrong line of work. Click the graphic to see how you compare.

Hat tip to VodkaPundit.

Monday, March 31, 2008

MLB 2008 Season Preview

My favorite time of year officially starts today: the 2008 baseball season. (I know, it officially started last week with the Red Sox-A's series in Japan, and continued with last night's Braves-Nationals game, but for me, the season hasn't started until the Yankees open up.) Here's a list of vague predictions for the league this year:

AL East:
1. Boston Red Sox -- This division is now a three-team race. The Red Sox are the favorites, of course--they're the champions until someone else takes it away from them.
2. New York Yankees -- The Yankees have two young starters in their rotation (and that could jump to three by year's end) and an entirely new coaching staff, but they still have the raw talent to make a good run at knocking the Sox from their division perch.
3. Toronto Blue Jays -- They made some good moves this offseason, and if the Red Sox and Yankees can't keep their rotations healthy, they could surprise and win this division yet.
4. Tampa Bay Rays -- No longer the joke of the league, but they're not quite contenders yet.
5. Baltimore Orioles -- The new joke of the league. Could lead the majors in losses. Still looking to trade away top talent. Incompetent management that starts in the owner's box.

AL Central:
1. Detroit Tigers -- Arguably this year's most improved team, and they weren't too shabby to start with. My pick for this year's World Series team from the AL, with their only question mark being their closer if Zumaya can't stay healthy and dominant. Todd Jones won't pick up last year's save total if he can't improve last year's ERA.
2. Cleveland Indians -- If they don't steal the division from Detroit, they're a lock for the AL wild card spot. Great rotation + great hitting = a very good team.
3. Chicago White Sox -- A solid team that won't be a serious contender, but watch out for them to play spoiler on some other contending teams late in the season.
4. Minnesota Twins -- Santana is gone, Liriano's health is a question mark, and their #3 starter is a guy named Boof. Sorry, Twin Cities, even adding the Meathook's kid brother to the lineup with the M&M Boys won't be enough to get you into contention this year.
5. Kansas City Royals -- Just like every year, they'll develop some great young talent who will then flee to larger markets and bigger paychecks. If baseball implemented a salary cap, maybe one day they could climb out of this spot.

AL West:
1. Anaheim Angels -- I still refuse to use this team's super-long new "official" name. Sometimes I even call them the California Angels. I miss Gene Mauch. Oh yeah, they're a lock to finish first in this weak division, even if Kelvim Escobar has to have his pitching arm amputated.
2. Seattle Mariners -- King Felix might be the best starter in the game right now. Ichiro will have an all-star caliber year (yet again). But that's nowhere near enough to catch the Angels.
3. Oakland A's -- Suffered some key losses this offseason. You never know what Billy Beane prospect is going to catch fire this year, and they've got a couple of good pitches, but this team is, for all intents and purposes, rebuilding this year.
4. Texas Rangers -- Also in a rebuilding year. They won't make any noise in '08.

NL East:
1. New York Mets -- Adding Johan Santana to their rotation makes them the favorite for this division, and probably for the entire NL. But there's always the chance they could choke. I mean again.
2. Philadelphia Phillies -- They added a closer, albeit an injured one, and their only real loss (Aaron Rowand) will be offset by the emergence of Shane Victorino. They're just waiting for the Mets to make a mistake.
3. Atlanta Braves -- They won't go away. This division will be a three-team race for most of the year. Bobby Cox knows three things: how to hold his liquor, how to keep his woman in line, and how to be a perennial contender.
4. Washington Nationals -- They're getting better, but I just don't see them in the playoff picture yet. Another potential spoiler team down the stretch. If they don't get to .500 this year, they won't miss it by much.
5. Florida Marlins -- Another rebuilding team. Not much more to say.

NL Central:
1. Chicago Cubs -- They could be the highest producing offense in the NL this season. Their question mark is keeping their pitchers healthy. If they can do that, they just might go to the big show in October.
2. Milwaukee Brewers -- The Brew Crew's youngsters are absolutely coming into their own this season. They'll be there to keep the Cubs honest, and if Chicago's pitching falls apart, could be this year's dark horse division champ.
3. Cincinnati Reds -- This year's candidate for Most Improved Team. They won't threaten anyone, but they're on the upswing.
4. St. Louis Cardinals -- They have some offense, but a poor and often-injured pitching staff will keep them from achieving much this year.
5. Pittsburgh Pirates -- See Kansas City Royals above.
6. Houston Astros -- Valverde is a solid closer, but Tejada is washed up and lost without his 'roids.

NL West:
1. Arizona Diamondbacks -- My pick to win this division, despite the continued presence of Randy Johnson in the rotation. Webb and Haren will more than make up for him. If they can bury the Big Cancer during the postseason, they might just make the World Series.
2. Colorado Rockies -- They might not have the success they had in 2007 (especially the late-season run), but they're still going to make some noise.
3. Los Angeles Dodgers -- Joe Torre is still missing a few pieces, but he's got the managerial skills to keep this team on the radar for most of this season.
4. San Diego Padres -- Good pitching, but lacking the offensive output to make the playoffs this year. Trevor Hoffman has at least one more great year left in him.
5. San Francisco Giants -- This team's play is as limp as the wrists of...you know what? I'm not going to go there. Barry Bonds's departure is a blessing in disguise, as no one will be paying attention to how lousy this team is this year. Could compete with Baltimore for the worst record in baseball.

Playoffs:
ALDS: Tigers over Angels, Red Sox over Indians
ALCS: Tigers over Red Sox
NLDS: Diamondbacks over Mets, Cubs over Rockies
NLCS: Diamondbacks over Cubs
World Series: Tigers over Diamondbacks

Hat tip to my good buddy Pat for pointing out that I originally had same-division teams playing each other in the ALDS.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Enemies List: Delmarva Power

This one's personal, not political. My utility company sends out its meter readers during the normal 9-to-5 workday, when I'm out of the house. My gas meter is in the basement, so they can't read it. About once a year, they'll jack up their estimate to get my attention, and I'll phone in the correct meter reading (which always ends up with me having a credit balance on my gas bill.)

But this year, I switched my electric provider to another company under Delaware's (relatively) new utility-choice program. Now, all of a sudden, my phoned-in reading isn't good enough, and they have to set up a meter reading appointment, based on 4 hour blocks. The first one starts at 8 AM (when I leave for work) and the last one starts at 4 PM (when I'm not home from work). Therefore, to get my punitively high (about $800) gas bill back to where it should be, I'm forced to either take time off from work, or else schedule them for the 4-8 PM block and hope they don't get there before about 6:00. I could make the case that I'm being punished for having a job and living alone, but the timing of this move seems to suggest that I'm being punished for ditching their excessive power rates and choosing a different supplier. Oddly enough, they're allowed to withhold payments from my supplier until I either correct the gas reading or pay their gas bill extortion inflation.

And what's worse than that is their ignorant and rude customer service staff. I was shuffled all around their phone system while trying to call in the meter reading/schedule the appointment, and every single one of them had a bad attitude, and...shall we say...a rather uneducated dialect. A helpful hint for future hiring practices: a supervisor in customer relations can "ask" me anything she wants, but should never, EVER try to "axe" me a question. Likewise, I want to schedule "an" appointment, not "a" appointment. Bill Cosby would not approve.

If you're a customer of this outfit that has been treated as poorly as I have, there is hope. You don't have to set up a Google bomb to make their site spring to the top of the results when you search for "hunk of shit". Instead, just keep your cool on the phone with their dropouts, and when you've finished, fill out this form to register a complaint with the state regulators, like I did. If enough of us fill out complaints, they will eventually have to take notice and make this monopoly behave itself.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Security Cartoons: So Bad They're Funny

I just got a link to a cartoon site from a colleague here at work. The catch? They're intended to educate end users about security-related issues (like e-mail viruses and phishing). The info is good, but the presentation is, for lack of a better word, terrible. Fortunately, it's so terrible that it comes all the way back around and ends up as hilarious unintentional comedy. I've been sitting here for the better part of twenty minutes reading one of these cartoons after the other. They're funny in a similar way as Pokey the Penguin, except the hilarity is accidental rather than ironic.

SecurityCartoon.com

Friday, March 21, 2008

ObaMack-Daddy, Part 2

This video is long, but hilariously funny. Especially because it's of a pastor saying the word "tits" in a sermon. Yes, my sense of humor does have a sophomoric streak.


Hat tip to huliq.com.

ObaMack-Daddy, Part 1

We all know what Don Imus said--here's what presidential candidate Barack Obama thought should happen to someone who made a bad joke:


In case you somehow missed it, here is (in my mind) the most provocative of the statements made by Obama's own pastor of many years, the Rev. Jeremiah Wright:


And here's Barack's condemnation of the man who calls for God to damn America:


Just sayin'.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

March Madness 2008

It's that time again--the only time of year when I'll watch basketball. I haven't watched the NBA regularly since Jordan retired (the first time)--he's the best player who'll ever come around in my lifetime; why bother with pretenders to the throne? (And yes, I did watch LeBron James's first game, and was unimpressed. Ditto for MJ's comeback with the Wizards.) But I do enjoy the college game--hungry young kids who haven't yet earned their mega-million dollar payday, who actually play defense, and who actually get called when they travel with the ball. I entered into a bracket-picking league (on Yahoo), but I didn't have the stones to actually put money on it this year. And somehow I ended up with my worst bracket ever--all four #1 seeds reaching the Final Four, no seed lower than 3 in the Elite 8, and my biggest upset #7 West Virginia over #2 Duke in the second round. I should have watched more of the conference tournaments to get ready for this one--I only saw a couple of games last Sunday. For the record, my finals pick is Memphis over Kansas to win it all.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Spitzer? I Hardly Know Her!

N.Y Gov. Eliot Spitzer, seen at left describing one of his sessions with high-priced call girls, is set to resign today.

I know I should feel bad for his wife and daughters (the oldest of whom isn't much younger than the women he was messing around with), but I can't help but feel a little smug watching this sawed-off little hypocrite crash and burn. For all his reputation as an "anti-corruption crusader", his most high-profile "cause" was one of the utmost importance: making sure radio DJs don't receive free beer or concert tickets from record companies.

When The Spitz's resignation takes effect on Monday, the country is going to have its first known blind governor. I think it would be funny and yet somehow appropriate if they switched in a copy of the Kama Sutra on him for the inauguration ceremony.

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Oxy Morons

Another nominee for the Darwin Awards.

Seriously, I just can't muster up a lot of sympathy for someone who steals a cancer patient's pain medicine. Yes, I know the one who died didn't do the actual stealing, but I'm sure he asked his buddy, "Where'd you get the pills?" before ingesting him into his body. And if he didn't, then this outcome was inevitable anyway.

Maybe I'm just cranky because my own (cold) pills are wearing off. Almost time to go to the drugstore and pass a background check to prove that I'm not a meth dealer just so I can get some medicine that actually works.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Blogroll Updates 2.20.08

Just doing a little bit of housekeeping, folks. I'm deleting two links from my blogroll. Comedian Jim Norton is gone, as his blog is no longer being updated, and my girlfriend has decided to make her blog readable by invitation only, so that link has to go as well.

With spring training starting up, I'm adding a baseball blog to the list that was passed to me by my buddy Zeb (and no, it's not a Yankee blog, either)--UmpBump.com.

Finally, I've changed my links and blogrolls section to be alphabetical rather than more-or-less-order-added. It's a timesaver when I add and delete links, since it will alphabetize automatically, versus me manually moving each new site to the bottom of the list.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

All In The Family

Fidel Castro resigns as Cuba's leader

If you have Fidel in your celebrity dead pool, it's looking better and better for you. He doesn't strike me as the type of guy who'd just up and quit unless his short term health outlook was very grim indeed.

Just don't look for any big changes in the lil'est Communist dictatorship, at least in the short term. Every indication is that baby brother Raul will simply remove the "interim" from his current job title and take over as the country's leader. He's talked of reform, but it sounds pretty minor league (increasing government wages rather than overhauling the totalitarian government structure). The only saving grace in this transition is that Raul is only five years younger than Fidel--hopefully once both of the Castro Brothers are gone, Cuba can be free once more and the U.S. can lift their embargoes. I want my Cuban cigars!

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Guevarobama

OK, enough sports...time for some politics!

Apparently, some of Obama's staff support a terrorist after all...just not one who's Islamic. Or alive.

This guy becomes more worrisome to me every day. I can't believe there's a candidate out there who makes Hilary Clinton the more appealing Democratic nominee.

Hat tip to Clay over at the August Knights Forums for spotting this one.

Houston, We Have A Steroid Problem

Roger says he didn't. Andy says he did. And Brian says he has the evidence to prove it.

And when it comes right down to it, Pettitte is pretty damn believable. He has admitted to his own use of HGH (for injury recovery at a time when it was allowed under MLB rules) and has nothing to gain.


McNamee, on the other hand, comes across as either a liar or an utter scumbag with his alleged physical evidence that he claims has been kept in his basement for the past eight years. If this is true, then he's been planning to turn on his friend and employer for a long, long time. That doesn't mark him as the kind of upstanding citizen who makes a reliable witness.

There are other little things that point to Clemens being a steroid user, like when he winged a piece of broken bat at Mike Piazza during the double-aught World Series--'roid rage, anyone? Then there's his giant head--other notable members of that club are Barry Bonds and Mark McGwire...hmmmm.

The whole "congressional inquiry" thing seems a bit ridiculous in sports when there's a war going on, but at least this series of hearings on grown men playing a kids' game is aimed at protecting people's health. Sen. Arlen Specter apparently feels it's the U.S. Senate Judiciary Committee's job to make sure no one's stealing signs, either.

Of course, the best argument to keep kids off steroids should be Roger Clemens's 2007 stats line. Combine that with a couple of months on the DL, and steroid abuse should be a thing of the past. Who wants to emulate those numbers?

Thursday, February 07, 2008

Sunday, February 03, 2008

Champs!!

I'm sitting here absolutely stunned right now. Two weeks into this season, I said to my dad, "The Giants are a 4-12 team...but I can't figure out which four teams they're going to beat." Five months later, my team is this year's champions. I couldn't have been more wrong about the game. I thought it would be an offensive shootout--somewhere along the lines of 38-35. I thought the "over" would be the safe bet--boy, was I wrong on that one. Here's some other random thoughts from the game and the season.

- Ryan Seacrest has no business on a football pregame show. If that little Nancy has ever watched a game in his life, it was to watch the linemen get into position (if you catch my drift.)

- Giants G.M. Jerry Reese is a genius. Everyone from this year's draft made a contribution, and even the guy from the preseason who made a big contribution to another team (Packers RB Ryan Grant) was traded for a pick in this year's draft.

- I was ready to fire Coughlin after a lackluster preseason and an 0-2 start. Now I think the Giants would be foolish to sign him to less than a 5-year extension. (And for the record, my girlfriend did predict that the Giants would win the Super Bowl to cheer me up after the loss to the Packers in week 2. She just didn't predict it'd be over her dad's Patriots.)

- I thought Joe Buck should be fired for calling Giants DE Justin Tuck "Jason Tuck" for the second consecutive broadcast during the game. I was even more appalled when Stuart Scott did the same thing during the SportsCenter highlights with time to prepare. Unpreparedness is, to my mind, a worse offense than trying to make a joke that comes up offensive. If Don Imus and Kelly Tilghman get punished, then Buck and Scott should be punished even more harshly for their faux pas.
- David Tyree's final catch should be replayed as often as that of Franco Harris. It truly was the Immaculate Reception for the new millenium.

- Who ever would have thought that the Mike Barnes of the NFL (that would be Randy Moss) would be more gracious in defeat than Bill Belichick, who basically got his start with the franchise that defeated him tonight? I guess that makes him the NFL's John Creese, which in turn makes Bob Kraft football's answer to Terry Silver.

- And apparently I wasn't the only naysayer who reads this blog. Check out the comments on this post.

Congratulations to the Patriots for setting the record for wins in a season, and for an excellent Super Bowl. And congratulations to MVP Eli Manning and the Giants. This truly was one for the ages, and for the next year, at least, you truly are...the best around.

(Photo from FoxSports.com.)

Monday, January 07, 2008

Easy E

Welcome back for another year at Beast's World! I'd like to start another year with congratulations to my New York Giants, especially Eli Manning and Tom Coughlin for finally winning a playoff game wearing the Big Blue. Next stop: Dallas; nothing would make me happier than for the Giants to be the team that knocks the Cowboys and the vastly overrated Tony Romo out of the playoffs.

As for the game itself, I'd give the game ball to Corey Webster, who has now shed his "bust" label in a single game with a pick and a fumble recovery. (Until yesterday, I had him pegged as Will Allen Jr., only with fewer interceptions.)

The only negative I can see out of this game is that after this, Tom Coughlin is sure to get a huge contract extension, and keep Kevin Gilbride with him. I just don't see the former as a Super Bowl winning coach, though I'd love to be wrong. As for Gilbride, let's just say that I don't think the man who brought us Ryan Leaf is the best person to be developing a mercurial talent like Eli Manning.

Of course, if the Giants do somehow manage to get to the Super Bowl, I'll have to eat that paragraph, but an NFC championship is sauce that can make crow taste oh-so-good.

(Photo from Sports Illustrated.)